You can smell a rejection from a mile away, yet it stinks, so much, that you cover your nose and make sure it doesn't go through your nostril and it catches you off-guard when you run out of breath and are forced to sniff it when it's right in front of you. That's when you kinda have to inhale, involuntarily, the bad gulp of air, at once.
In short: it sucks.
Tuesday, December 8, 2015
Sunday, December 6, 2015
About Thanksgiving!
It's been a while since I feel like writing something with lots of meat in it, so this post will be it. #punintended
Last weekend, as a part of our plan to recreate Thanksgiving-in-the-U.S. in Indonesia, my friends and I rent a service apartment in Kuningan Area (***w**d) where we can get together, bring lots of food, booze, games, and as I mentioned earlier in this entry, have our very own Thanksgiving dinner brouhaha...
and if brouhaha isn't the right word to describe it, I don't know what else will be.
As a start, our menu is something like: turkey . gravy . cranberry sauce . pizza . charcoal pizza . kfc bucket . lamb kabob . baked pastel . crab rangoon . brie cheese with fig jam . filled egg with fancy stuff . lasagna . macaroni schotel . risoles . sausages . salad . martabak manis . martabak asin . raspberry pretzel pie . nutella pie . apple crumble . wine (cab) . wine (cab + merlot) . wine (merlot) . grey goose . 2x24 bintang beer . 2x24 bintang radler beer .
... yeah, something like that. I might have forgotten a couple, because who wouldn't after stuffing all sort of food into one's mouth like that?
We dined before playing more than one drinking game because everybody got bored pretty easily. At first, we played "heads up" in teams. Some teams are pretty good even though there are more than one occurrences where this happened:
A: *acting this one out, literally, minus the hotness*
B: BADMINTON!
...
We then named our cups to move on to cup games. Mine was named "alcoholic" because, you know, they just have the most baseless assumption that I drink a lot. We also chose a loser song to be played everytime one had to drink. Our loser song of the night was this.
We played King's Cup, Flip Cup, and countless card games to finish the liquor. Apparently that's the goal of the night (re: to finish the liquor).
At the end of everything, we feel pretty hollow about the fact that we need to get back to reality. Everybody misses those times we spent in our apartment in the U.S. with/without friends coming over. Everybody misses having our own "space" at a certain age when life doesn't seem too much cluttered with, well, lives, of us and other people, who suddenly pop in the way, saying "Hi, btw, you should think about us too. Nope, you don't have any choice and you can't bail right now..."
Regardless, two days are too long to be a Negative Nancy and should be too short to be a Hopeful Hillary1. We must remain grateful that we have each other, at least.
To remind myself of the fabulous 2015, this is the list of what I've been thankful for:
- a chance to travel more than I've ever had in years.
- an elementary family who started to learn that I don't need to be available in every family business (and that I have needs to go out more than I used to).
- a brother who just earned his private pilot license.
- more than one accountability partner who gladly will slap me in my face when I'm acting less like a rational person and more like a douchebag.
- more than one BFF for life who gladly will act douchey with me when we feel like we need to.
- a job that can keep up with my moody self.
- alcohol.
- instagram filters.
- a not-so-bad transition to my 25-year-old self. I had a couple2 of good-cry days and stuff... I also had a breakout, which is not a normal quarter-life crisis reaction after I did my research (What am I? A certified late-bloomer?) but I think it could have been worse.
- a good mood that encourages me to start writing again...
these two boxes of pizza is the earlier food that arrived, so we happened to take a picture of them, before everything else came and we ate everything voraciously.
the eating group at the dinner table, the cooking group was at the back, in the kitchen, cooking...
big elisa's head and half of the squad
May we keep the thankful attitude way beyond the thanksgiving weekend, and may being thankful doesn't stop us from being hungry young blood who chase our dreams and what-not.
1 I made that up
2 Well, more than a couple.
Last weekend, as a part of our plan to recreate Thanksgiving-in-the-U.S. in Indonesia, my friends and I rent a service apartment in Kuningan Area (***w**d) where we can get together, bring lots of food, booze, games, and as I mentioned earlier in this entry, have our very own Thanksgiving dinner brouhaha...
and if brouhaha isn't the right word to describe it, I don't know what else will be.
As a start, our menu is something like: turkey . gravy . cranberry sauce . pizza . charcoal pizza . kfc bucket . lamb kabob . baked pastel . crab rangoon . brie cheese with fig jam . filled egg with fancy stuff . lasagna . macaroni schotel . risoles . sausages . salad . martabak manis . martabak asin . raspberry pretzel pie . nutella pie . apple crumble . wine (cab) . wine (cab + merlot) . wine (merlot) . grey goose . 2x24 bintang beer . 2x24 bintang radler beer .
... yeah, something like that. I might have forgotten a couple, because who wouldn't after stuffing all sort of food into one's mouth like that?
We dined before playing more than one drinking game because everybody got bored pretty easily. At first, we played "heads up" in teams. Some teams are pretty good even though there are more than one occurrences where this happened:
A: *acting this one out, literally, minus the hotness*
B: BADMINTON!
...
We then named our cups to move on to cup games. Mine was named "alcoholic" because, you know, they just have the most baseless assumption that I drink a lot. We also chose a loser song to be played everytime one had to drink. Our loser song of the night was this.
We played King's Cup, Flip Cup, and countless card games to finish the liquor. Apparently that's the goal of the night (re: to finish the liquor).
At the end of everything, we feel pretty hollow about the fact that we need to get back to reality. Everybody misses those times we spent in our apartment in the U.S. with/without friends coming over. Everybody misses having our own "space" at a certain age when life doesn't seem too much cluttered with, well, lives, of us and other people, who suddenly pop in the way, saying "Hi, btw, you should think about us too. Nope, you don't have any choice and you can't bail right now..."
Regardless, two days are too long to be a Negative Nancy and should be too short to be a Hopeful Hillary1. We must remain grateful that we have each other, at least.
To remind myself of the fabulous 2015, this is the list of what I've been thankful for:
- a chance to travel more than I've ever had in years.
- an elementary family who started to learn that I don't need to be available in every family business (and that I have needs to go out more than I used to).
- a brother who just earned his private pilot license.
- more than one accountability partner who gladly will slap me in my face when I'm acting less like a rational person and more like a douchebag.
- more than one BFF for life who gladly will act douchey with me when we feel like we need to.
- a job that can keep up with my moody self.
- alcohol.
- instagram filters.
- a not-so-bad transition to my 25-year-old self. I had a couple2 of good-cry days and stuff... I also had a breakout, which is not a normal quarter-life crisis reaction after I did my research (What am I? A certified late-bloomer?) but I think it could have been worse.
- a good mood that encourages me to start writing again...
And now, as promised...
Brouhaha Pictures!
these two boxes of pizza is the earlier food that arrived, so we happened to take a picture of them, before everything else came and we ate everything voraciously.
the eating group at the dinner table, the cooking group was at the back, in the kitchen, cooking...
big elisa's head and half of the squad
the girls.
nope, the one i was holding was not liquor, guys. It was a bottle of chili because, uum, i need to get hotter?
the guys.
nope, they weren't drunk. this is their usual selves.
candidly taken *seriously*
the complete pack
me and my cute love
May we keep the thankful attitude way beyond the thanksgiving weekend, and may being thankful doesn't stop us from being hungry young blood who chase our dreams and what-not.
1 I made that up
2 Well, more than a couple.
Friday, December 4, 2015
Friday, November 27, 2015
About DJ Snake's Middle (or not)
Never mind the popping, beamy dots...
I know, they're pretty annoying.
I hope it's okay with you; in the middle of this post, I'm putting DJ Snake's Middle link for all of us to enjoy!
The silence in the air felt like my soul froze
Am I just overthinking feelings? I can't tell.
This gut feeling I'm tryna gain, I feel it well
I hope we find our missing pieces, I'm just --chill
We're gonna sweep it under the carpet...
This song has been on repeat for--I don't know, a couple of hundred times?--in the past 24 hours. I've learned how to do a good mandolin cover for it so here you go, DJ Snake's Middle, mandolin cover, by me! #roundofapplause #takeabow #pickupparker*
JUST KIDDING. Not there yet, guys. Not there, yet.
It's a thanksgiving week now, in the U.S. I bet lots of you are putting Turkey in the middle of the table as we speak, and I would like to wish you all a happy, thankful, Thanksgiving! My friends and I are planning a thanksgiving dinner tonight, with Turkey and booze, so I'm very excited. These guys are literally bringing the tradition to 8,972 miles away** and putting a new spin on "Thanksgiving Dinner" --Turkey + Martabak Manis, anyone?
I'll post the pics and brouhaha next.
Well, I hope you're having a good Thanksgiving weekend in the middle of your crazy schedule / closing-the-book period / life in general. I will close with these wise words from a wise man out there:
"May your stuffing be tasty; may your turkey plump
May your potatoes and gravy have nary a lump
May your yams be delicious and your pies take the prize
May your Thanksgiving dinner stay off of your thighs"
GOBBLE GOBBLE
*Parker is my mandolin's name. He's awesome.
**This is exact LA-Jakarta distance, according to Google
Tuesday, August 4, 2015
About the things you're not supposed to say when you *only* moderately like a girl
That you can't stop thinking about her.
That you fall for her and feel like you're willing to give everything for her.
That you weep for her, once, or twice.
That you can imagine being 40 and waking up next to her.
That you would spend the rest of your life with her, given a different circumstance in life.
That you want her to be around because you need her and she could just be the one.
That you question the universe about the meaning of your meet-cute story.
That if things were different, you would kneel down and ride off into the sunset with her.
That she's different and you think of her in a different way, so she should think of you in a different way too, and that you both would have been perfect together.
That you love her, and she should not forget about that, when clearly you're just not there yet.
Because she might have taken them a little bit too seriously, and because she might fall in love with you for what she thought you really feel.
Because she masturbates to those words, and because they please her more than she thought they would.
Because she doesn't expect anything, but the fact that those words matter and are true.
Because later when she finds out that they are not, she will be torn and as always, the blame will be on her for believing too much, for caring too much, for giving too much.
And later when she becomes a woman, she will remember you as a lesson, not to play with fire because fire burns, and it sure does hurt a lot.
That you fall for her and feel like you're willing to give everything for her.
That you weep for her, once, or twice.
That you can imagine being 40 and waking up next to her.
That you would spend the rest of your life with her, given a different circumstance in life.
That you want her to be around because you need her and she could just be the one.
That you question the universe about the meaning of your meet-cute story.
That if things were different, you would kneel down and ride off into the sunset with her.
That she's different and you think of her in a different way, so she should think of you in a different way too, and that you both would have been perfect together.
That you love her, and she should not forget about that, when clearly you're just not there yet.
Because she might have taken them a little bit too seriously, and because she might fall in love with you for what she thought you really feel.
Because she masturbates to those words, and because they please her more than she thought they would.
Because she doesn't expect anything, but the fact that those words matter and are true.
Because later when she finds out that they are not, she will be torn and as always, the blame will be on her for believing too much, for caring too much, for giving too much.
And later when she becomes a woman, she will remember you as a lesson, not to play with fire because fire burns, and it sure does hurt a lot.
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